Everyone wants to know the secret on how to be happy. Or happier…. in our love life, home life, work life. Happier with our bodies, happier with ourselves, happier in the moment. Happier NOW! 

Now that we are officially in the New Year the focus is on how we can all be a little better. I know the idea of making resolutions is overdone and overrated, but there is still something to starting the year off with a fresh slate and a healthy sense of optimism. I have my usual list of things I need to work on that pretty much repeats every year: drink more water, workout regularly (not just manically before vacation) , spend more time with friends, eat better, do more yoga, stress less….. And every year I make progress but I feel like I always need a reminder to keep me on track and to make those things a routine.

How to be Happy

Looking back, many life-changing moments I’ve experienced started small, things on a list that I set my mind on accomplishing or overcoming. And many of those things came from books I’d read on ways to be more successful, feel more confident, live the life you want to live. It’s strange when you stop to think about the power something so simple and so inexpensive can have on shaping you as a person and changing your entire life. It’s amazing really, how reading can open up a whole new world and give you the power and the courage to be whoever and whatever you want to be. Even more incredible is that the world has never been more open to new ideas and sharing information as it is now, and the best part is it’s all at our fingertips. Think of how amazing it is that anyone with just a smartphone can access millions of books on any subject imaginable. Think of how easy it is to learn about anything you wish, and anyone you’re inspired by just by typing in a word or a name.

Happiness is something most of us think about a lot and actively work toward very little. We wait for the right circumstances, the right relationship, the right job, the right number in a bank account — and then we’re genuinely surprised when those things arrive and the happiness we expected doesn’t quite follow.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Not in a heavy, existential way, but in the practical, let’s-actually-do-something-about-this way that I tend to approach most things. Because I believe happiness is less of a destination and more of a practice — something you build deliberately, in small daily choices, over a long period of time.

And because I am, at my core, a list person, I’m going to share some of the things that have genuinely moved the needle for me. Plus a list of books that belong on every happiness-seeker’s nightstand.

Happiness Is a Practice, Not a Prize

The research on happiness is actually pretty encouraging once you dig into it. Studies consistently show that about 40 percent of our happiness is within our direct control — shaped by our habits, our mindset, our relationships and how we spend our time. That’s not a small number. That’s nearly half of your entire happiness experience, available to you regardless of your circumstances.

The other pieces — genetics and life circumstances — matter, but they’re less changeable. The 40 percent that’s ours to shape? That’s where the work is. And it turns out the work isn’t dramatic or complicated. It’s mostly about showing up consistently for small, unglamorous habits that compound over time.

Daily Habits That Actually Move the Needle

Start the Day With Intention

The first 20 minutes of a morning set the tone for everything that follows. Not perfectly — some mornings the alarm doesn’t go off and the coffee spills and the intention goes straight out the window, and that’s fine. But most mornings, having even a small ritual that is yours — five minutes of quiet, a written gratitude practice, a walk around the block, a cup of coffee before anyone else is awake — creates a sense of agency and calm that carries into the day.

It doesn’t need to be elaborate. It just needs to be intentional.

Write Things Down

There is something about putting thoughts on paper that clarifies and releases them in a way that just thinking about them doesn’t accomplish. Gratitude journaling in particular has a significant body of research behind it — people who write down three specific things they’re grateful for daily show measurable increases in wellbeing over time. Not vague gratitude, but specific: not “I’m grateful for my family” but “I’m grateful that my daughter laughed at breakfast today and it reminded me why all of this is worth it.”

Specific, sensory, present-tense gratitude is the version that works.

Move Your Body Consistently

Exercise is the most evidence-backed happiness intervention available and it’s completely free. Not intense training necessarily — a 20-minute walk outside has a measurable effect on mood, anxiety and energy levels. The body and the brain are connected in ways we’re still discovering, and treating physical movement as a mental health practice rather than a cosmetic one changes how motivated you feel to actually do it.

Protect Your Energy and Your Time

Happiness research consistently shows that relationships are the single strongest predictor of wellbeing across a lifetime. Not success, not wealth, not achievement — relationships. Which means protecting your time and energy for the people and experiences that fill you up rather than drain you is not selfish. It’s actually the most strategic happiness investment you can make.

This includes the relationship you have with your phone and your social media consumption. What you consume daily shapes your baseline mood more than most people realize. Audit it occasionally and edit accordingly.

Do Something That Scares You

Comfort zones are comfortable for a reason, but they have a ceiling. The moments that tend to generate the strongest sense of aliveness, pride and genuine joy are almost always the ones that required doing something uncomfortable first. Starting the business. Having the honest conversation. Signing up for the thing you weren’t sure you were ready for.

Fear is often just excitement without enough breath behind it. Breathe into it and see what’s on the other side.

Stop Performing and Start Living

A significant portion of unhappiness comes from managing other people’s perceptions of our life rather than actually living it. Social media has amplified this to an extraordinary degree, but it predates the internet by centuries. The antidote is radical authenticity — being the actual version of yourself rather than the curated one, making decisions based on what genuinely matters to you rather than what looks good from the outside.

This is harder than it sounds and more liberating than almost anything else on this list.

The Books That Will Help You Get There

I am a firm believer that the right book at the right moment can genuinely change your life. Not always in a dramatic, lightning-bolt way — sometimes just in the quiet, clarifying way of reading something that puts words to what you already knew but hadn’t quite formed yet. These are the books I recommend most often when someone tells me they want to feel better, think better and live more fully.

Here is a list of books to help you be a HAPPIER person this year:

1. You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero

This book has a cult following for good reason. Jen Sincero is like your best friend who tells it like it is — she takes all the basic common-sense stuff you need to hear and delivers it with zero sugar coating and zero tolerance for the stories we tell ourselves to stay stuck. If you’re caught up in self-doubt and letting your insecurities hold you back, this is the book that smacks you (lovingly) out of it.

Shop You Are a Badass on Amazon

2. 52 Lists for Happiness by Moorea Seal

A beautiful journal and prompting guide designed to inspire you every single day of the year. If you’re a list person like me, this one was made for us. Each week’s list is a gentle push toward more self-awareness, more gratitude and more intentional living.

Shop 52 Lists for Happiness on Amazon

3. The Positivity Kit by Lisa Currie

An interactive, playful book that functions as part journal, part creative exercise and part daily reminder that joy is available right now, not just when everything is figured out. It’s the kind of book you pick up for five minutes and feel genuinely better afterward.

Shop The Positivity Kit on Amazon

4. Damn Good Advice by George Lois

Written by a legend in the advertising world, this book is an ego-pumping, dream-big, just-do-it read that lights a fire under your creative side and your ambition simultaneously. If you’re feeling stuck, stifled or like you’ve talked yourself out of too many things you actually wanted to do, this is the book that talks you back in.

Shop Damn Good Advice on Amazon

5. Eat Pretty by Jolene Hart

Happiness lives in the body as much as the mind, and this book makes a compelling and accessible case for nourishing yourself as an act of self-respect rather than vanity or discipline. The connection between what we eat and how we feel is real, and Jolene Hart explains it in a way that inspires rather than overwhelms.

Shop Eat Pretty on Amazon

6. I Am Here Now by The Mindfulness Project

A visual, interactive mindfulness book that makes the practice of being present feel approachable rather than intimidating. Presence is the foundation of happiness — you cannot feel genuinely joyful about your life if you’re not actually in it — and this book helps you get there in small, beautiful increments.

Shop I Am Here Now on Amazon

7. Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You by Robie Rogge and Dian G. Smith

A journal built around Eleanor Roosevelt’s most enduring piece of advice. Each page offers a prompt, a space and an invitation to expand your comfort zone incrementally. Small brave things add up to a genuinely braver, fuller life.

Shop Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You on Amazon

8. Subliminal: How Your Unconscious Mind Rules Your Behavior by Leonard Mlodinow

Understanding why you do what you do — the unconscious patterns, biases and motivations that drive most of your behavior — is one of the most useful things you can invest time in. Mlodinow makes neuroscience genuinely readable and the insights are immediately applicable to how you think about your own happiness and decision-making.

Shop Subliminal by Leonard Mlodinow on Amazon

9. Start Where You Are by Meera Lee Patel

A stunning, hand-lettered journal and guide that meets you exactly where you are right now — not where you wish you were or where you think you should be. The prompts and artwork work together to help you clarify what you want, appreciate what you have and take the next right step from wherever you’re standing.

Shop Start Where You Are on Amazon

10. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k by Mark Manson

Because happiness truly starts when you stop giving a f**k what everyone else thinks. When you decide to be your real, authentic self and stop spending your limited time and energy on worry and fear and the opinions of people who are not living your life. Mark Manson is funny and blunt and genuinely wise, and this book will rearrange something in your brain in the best possible way.

Shop The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k on Amazon

For even more reading that will change how you think and how you show up, check out our full list of best self-help and self-development books to read this year.

The Simple Truth About Being Happy

If I had to distill everything I’ve learned about happiness into the smallest possible version, it would be this: happiness is available right now, in the life you already have, if you’re willing to look for it with real attention and protect it with real intention.

It doesn’t require a perfect life. It doesn’t require everything to be figured out. It requires showing up for your own life — the actual one, not the hypothetical better one you’re waiting for — with gratitude and presence and a willingness to do the small hard things that make the big things possible.

Start with one book from this list. Start with one habit from this post. Start where you are. That’s always been the only place you can start from anyway.

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Shop This Post

• You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero
• 52 Lists for Happiness by Moorea Seal
• The Positivity Kit by Lisa Currie
• Damn Good Advice by George Lois
• Eat Pretty by Jolene Hart
• I Am Here Now by The Mindfulness Project
• Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You
• Subliminal by Leonard Mlodinow
• Start Where You Are by Meera Lee Patel
• The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k by Mark Manson

checkout our How to Live Your Best Life post
print out the free motivational list of habits that can change your life

watch out! How cutting carbs and caffeine could actually hurt your health .. read this post

What Is Happiness

So in the spirit of starting the new year off inspiring and being inspired by others, I’m sharing a few of my lists. Because I am a list person. I love making lists and use them to accomplish everything from my daily tasks to my big life goals.

10% Happier Podcast

Listen to the Ten Percent Happier Podcast with Dan Harris.  

Learn how to train your mind to be ten percent happier. Check out this YouTube video

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